- https://paradiseperformingartscenter.com/tiekbpap The illness(es) I live with are: Sjögren’s syndrome. Also Factor V Leiden, Hypothyroidism, PCOS, Asthma, ?Interstitial Cystitis, Esophageal Motility Disorder
- Ordering Tramadol Online I was diagnosed with it (Sjögren’s) in the year: 2011
- https://mocicc.org/agricultura/csqppv8f0si But I had symptoms since: 2007-2008
- https://www.marineetstamp.com/x26vdycxe4 The biggest adjustment I’ve had to make is: Being out of work and on disability; having to take rest periods throughout the day.
- https://www.mbtn.net/?p=n0uf2dz Most people assume: A lot. Specifically that I must be feeling well because I “look” fine and that I am taking advantage of the system because I am young and disabled/on Medicare.
- https://www.mreavoice.org/7veyj3exg1a The hardest part about mornings are: Figuring out how I am going to prioritize my day.
- https://lpgventures.com/ozw76d56 My favorite medical TV show is: Grey’s Anatomy. https://www.mreavoice.org/w4syskikj
- https://www.brigantesenglishwalks.com/8tt7oi2i0m3 A gadget I couldn’t live without is: My laptop. It makes writing easier and keeps me connected to the world on days I cannot leave the house.
- https://www.yolascafe.com/be36m342 The hardest part about nights are: Pain. My pain is usually worse at night. And not sleeping.
- Tramadol Buy Online Usa Each day I take: At least 15 pills/supplements. And that is an improvement.
- Tramadol Online Overnight 180 Regarding alternative treatments: I have been doing this for about 10 months. I am not as convinced that alternative medicine can “cure” autoimmune illnesses but I have had significant improvement with a lot of my issues so I think alternative medicine is a critical aspect of my treatment plan.
- I follow site f I had to choose between an invisible illness or visible I would choose: Neither. This is a dumb question.
- go to site Regarding working and career: I miss it. I miss caring for other people on a daily basis and I miss the intellectual challenge of working in the medical field. I enjoy writing but I have come to find out that I enjoyed “going” to work.
- Ordering Tramadol From Mexico People would be surprised to know: I get sick of hearing people complain sometimes. Not my friends who confide in me about something, even about minor matters. But I get sick of people complaining on Facebook about the stupidest things. I try to sit back and remember that everyone’s issues are different and important to them. It bothers me when people are always (note that I said always) complaining about their kids. Be grateful you have them.
- https://penielenv.com/fijx45tk The hardest thing to accept about my new reality has been: source That I will never be cured.
- Online Tramadol Store Something I never thought I could do with my illness that I did was: Write a book which is currently being published!
- source link The commercials about my illness: https://www.yolascafe.com/2l1sjl94ye Don’t exist!
- https://getdarker.com/editorial/articles/hra8lynh Something I really miss doing since I was diagnosed is: Being able to just “get up and go” whenever I want; being spontaneous; working. Most of all I miss waking up and physically feeling good.
- Tramadol Online Mastercard It was really hard to have to give up: Some of the foods I used to enjoy; my nursing job.
- follow link A new hobby I have taken up since my diagnosis is: Writing!
- https://dcinematools.com/a9t9xxil30s If I could have one day of feeling normal again I would: There are SO many things! But since it is only one day, I would go skydiving.
- source site My illness has taught me: What it is like to truly physically suffer. It has taught me to be grateful and humble. It has taught me the value of true friendships and the necessity of keeping toxic, negative people out of my life. It has taught me who my real friends are. It has taught me to appreciate the everyday events in life.
- https://paradiseperformingartscenter.com/vc06c3iaugn Want to know a secret? One thing people say that gets under my skin is: http://www.mscnantes.org/v5lpsopnjsn Advice on how to handle my illness. This is a fine line. I am OK when somebody mentions something to me once i.e.: a Paleo diet. But it ticks me off when they bring it up over and over again. It also upsets me beyond all reason when someone I know tries to sell me some “miracle cure”. Completely classless. Luckily, it doesn’t happen often. There are a few other things but those are the biggies.
- https://mocicc.org/agricultura/oek06fk5uyb But I love it when people: Call me or check in via e-mail. Spontaneous visits. I love it when people tell me that my writing has made a difference in their life.
- enter site My favorite motto, scripture, quote that gets me through tough times is: Way too many to list. If you go to my blog’s Facebook page, you will see what I mean.
- Tramadol Using Mastercard When someone is diagnosed I’d like to tell them: Never, ever give up.
- go to site Something that has surprised me about living with an illness is: That I am happier now than before I was diagnosed.
- source The nicest thing someone did for me when I wasn’t feeling well was: There is no one thing because so many people have done so much for me. Things that I appreciate a lot though include: offering to bring me lunch or dinner, offering a ride to an appointment, sending me regular mail (like in the mailbox!), making me laugh, talking to me about anything besides me being sick.
- https://www.marineetstamp.com/1yhbm8ej90c I’m involved with Invisible Awareness Week source url because: see I think it’s important to help raise awareness and educate others about what those of us living with invisible illness(es) are really going through each and every day.
- https://purestpotential.com/n7e4derjosb The fact that you read this list makes me feel: Hopeful!
Category: chronic illness (Page 7 of 13)
I have had a difficult decision to make ever since my husband and I booked our honeymoon to Disney; which is in less than three weeks. To the average person it may not seem like a big deal but to me, it has been this gut wrenching decision that has taken me months to make and come to terms with. The decision I was struggling over was whether or not to rent a scooter to use during the eight days we are down in Florida at Disneyworld.
Most people I have talked to regarding this decision do not understand why I would even consider NOT renting a scooter considering the physical issues I have with arthritis, fatigue, and the difficulty I have with extreme heat and sun. To them, it seems like a no-brainer. And in some aspects it is a no-brainer. If you Google “scooters” and “Disney”, you will see that the use of scooters in Disney is rampant. A whole other topic for another day. It’s not like I would be doing anything unusual. Rent the scooter and just use it. Disney is huge. Why stress out over it?
I have never used an assistive device during all these years that I have battled extreme pain and fatigue. Not once. I have been on vacations and day trips. I have struggled at times to even get through a short shopping list at Stop and Shop where by the way, they do have scooters. I am not against scooters, wheelchairs, canes, walkers, or any other assistive devices. I know people who need them and use them. But I do not use them.
It is not because I do not physically qualify to use something like this at times because anyone who knows me knows that I certainly have had periods of time over the past five plus years where an assistive device would have been most helpful; especially a scooter. At first I thought it was just a pride thing or that I was worried what people would think when they looked at me using a scooter. I have this invisible illness which means that I typically look well on the outside and feel horrible on the inside. But then I realized that it is so much more than that. My desire and determination to intermittently not use an assistive device is due to one emotion and one reason: fear. I am scared to death.
I am scared to death that this autoimmune illness I have will progress. That someday I will be dependent on an assistive device to be able to go out into the world or even to function in my own home. I am scared to death because I have had so many different body systems affected by this illness that someday, it will get the better of me. I fear that I will end up in kidney failure or with neurological impairment that will prevent me from walking. I fear that I will be one of the Sjogren’s patients who develops Non-Hodgkin’s lymphoma. Or pulmonary hypertension. Or end-stage liver disease. These are not unrealistic fears. Although not as common as some of the other Sjogren’s symptoms, they do happen. People do die. So to me, needing to use a scooter at Disney feels like I am giving in to my illness.
To be honest, this position I have taken for myself about using assistive devices has served me well over the past several years. Has it caused me more pain? Sure. Has it sometimes limited what I can go out in the world and do? I don’t think so. But I do believe with my whole heart that pushing myself in terms of my mobility has made a positive impact on my lifestyle. I am a big believer in using what you have and also in the idea that you lose what you don’t use. I know there are people who have no choice in whether they use an assistive device or not. I have that choice. And I believe that if I had made a different choice, I wouldn’t be as active as I now am on some days.
This decision has been complicated by the fact that I got a sense from my husband that he was not on board with this whole scooter at Disney thing. And before anyone goes jumping down his throat about this, it has taken some heart to heart discussions between us to get to why I was getting weird vibes from him about it. (Disclaimer: I have his permission to publicly blog about this.) Of course I don’t need his permission in my decision about whether to use a scooter or not but I do value his opinion and it was important to me to hear his thoughts. I also felt like I needed his support on this. Come to find out, the weird vibes I was getting were accurate. My husband eventually told me that even though he wants me to do whatever I feel I need to do, that he felt like renting a scooter would be giving in to my illness. Same exact thoughts I was having.
But here’s the thing and this I know with absolute certainty: I’m a fighter. I have never given in to this illness. There are times where I have been accepting of the illness and the limitations it has imposed on me but I would not call that giving up or giving in. I also know that many, if not most people reading this, have no idea of what I go through on a daily basis just to function. Although my husband has a pretty good idea, he still cannot physically feel what I feel. He does not know every single instance I have pushed through when I should have been home in bed. Nobody does but me. And that is how I prefer it to be because I don’t want my life to be a series of verbal complaints coming out of my mouth about how lousy I feel.
I remembered a similar decision I was trying to make a few years ago regarding applying for a handicap parking placard. Similar thought process. A good friend told me that I should get the placard and if it made me feel better, only use it when I absolutely had to. She must have told me this on several occasions and finally I got one. And as I was making my scooter decision, I thought about all the times I got myself to the store, the doctor, or to a much needed social event just because I could use that handicap placard and park closer to my destination. I thought about how during those times, I had more energy to complete my errands or enjoy my time out with friends because of the placard.
Why would Disney be any different? Say for example it’s Day Two of our trip. It’s 5pm and we have spent a majority of the day at Animal Kingdom and we are now resting back at our hotel. And my husband and I want to go Downtown Disney to try one of the many restaurants there that we have been talking about for the past year and a half. But my joints hurt so bad and I am so exhausted that I cannot fathom getting out of the bed and leaving the hotel room. But wait, there’s my scooter. So my choices are, postpone Downtown Disney until a different day and hope that I am feeling better or not give in to my fears and take the scooter to dinner.
Have I mentioned that this is our HONEYMOON?!?
So I have rented a scooter for the week that we are at Disney. Why? Because I have decided that the possibility of enjoying our honeymoon more fully AND making the experience better not only for myself, but for my husband, is much more important than giving in. I’m not talking about the giving in to the illness, but rather the giving in to my fear. Because not renting/using a scooter and then not being able to do what I (we) want to do IS letting the illness win. It is taking a gamble on letting this thing called Sjögren’s dictate how we are going to enjoy this precious time together. That is not acceptable to me. Because like I said, I’m a fighter.
*********************************************************
If anyone out there has any experiences with using a scooter in Disney, please share your experiences in the comment section below. I am open to hearing about both good and bad experiences because your experiences could help me to have a better one. Thank you.
It is pretty common knowledge by now that I have written a book called Tales From The Dry Side: The Personal Stories Behind The Autoimmune Illness Sjögren’s Syndrome. It is a compilation of thirteen personal stories told by people with Sjögren’s syndrome. I am attempting to self publish the book through a company called Outskirts Press and I am doing a funding campaign through Kickstarter.com in order to get the book published.
Kickstarter works as a rewards system funding platform which means that financial contributors can elect to receive a reward from the author based on their donation level. Rewards start at $25 but the minimum donation is only $1.00. In order to donate you must sign up on Kickstarter and have an Amazon account because Amazon handles the money exchange at the end of the project which in this case is August 3rd at 5:30pm. If you do not have an Amazon account, it is very easy to sign up for one. I have been told by contributors that the entire process takes anywhere from 2-10 minutes depending on whether or not you have an Amazon account. Your credit card (via Amazon) does not get charged unless I raise the entire $7000 by August 3rd. if I do not raise the entire amount, you get charged nothing. You can read more about the book and the Kickstarter campaign on my Kickstarter page by clicking HERE.
To date, 43% of the funds needed have been raised. There are twenty more days to raise the money.
A lot of people have put a lot of hard work into these stories and into trying to get this book published. If you think you might be interested in donating but are not quite sure, the following is an excerpt from chapter 13 of the book entitled “Christine”:
There are very few people who follow my blog or who are even in my life who know the extent of the disaster my life was from about 2001 through 2009. I was in a destructive marriage with a man who was abusive, an alcoholic, had PTSD, and was just a difficult person to live with. A man who decided about two years into our marriage that he did not want children. I had distanced myself from some of my family and many of my friends. I held a job that I loved but yet found very stressful. For some of those years I was seventy-seven pounds heavier than I am now. I had a food addiction and low self-esteem. There were many times when I considered suicide and the threat was real enough that I was hospitalized several times for depression. For a period of time, I was even considered to have bipolar disorder and I was trialed on every class of psychiatric medications that existed. The diagnosis was later retracted by the same psychiatrist who diagnosed me and my mood issues were thought to be the beginning of my autoimmune disorder, coupled with significant environmental stressors. Then the physical symptoms of my autoimmune illness began.
2008-2009 found me very sick with Sjogren’s syndrome. I eventually ran out of sick time and FMLA and lost my job. On the day that my ex-husband threatened me and I thought he was going to be physically violent because he was so drunk, I told him we were done. I got divorced and lost my home. I lost one of my beloved dogs. No job, no home, no kids, no health, no marriage…no nothing.
But wait, I did have something. I had God. I had my family. I had a few friends.
I had myself.
So why am I even bothering to tell you all this six days before I marry my second husband? Because I want people to know. I want to tell anyone reading this who thinks that the only way out is through suicide that there is always a better way out. There is help out there. You can change your situation. The feeling of hopelessness you have now does not mean that things can not get better.
My upcoming marriage has stirred up a lot of emotions recently. Obviously that is due in part to the fact that I am marrying this incredible man who is my best friend and whom I love with all my heart. But the emotions are also there because over the past few weeks, I have stopped to think about where I am and how far I have come. Because at some point I stopped letting myself be a victim. I dealt with my depression and anxiety. I saw a therapist. I developed a positive attitude. An attitude that got me through some pretty dark days. I worked on my relationship with God and with myself. Step by step I made changes in my life that enabled me to be a whole person rather than the empty shell of one that I was during those years.
I still struggle with health issues. I still struggle at times with my self esteem. But at the end of the day I like the face of the person looking back at me in the mirror. Sometimes it is hard for me to think back on the past and even believe that was me. However I have to look back from time to time because those experiences have helped make me the courageous and determined individual I am today.
I am at peace.
I am happy.
So please don’t give up. You are worth more than the sum of your bad experiences. God has put you in this world for a reason. The reason may not be apparent to you now. It may never be apparent to you but I promise you, your presence in this world will make a difference to somebody.
Be strong.
Keep going.
So today is my birthday and no, this is not a post about how great birthdays are; even though they are great! Rather, I am giving myself the birthday gift of writing a quick blog about something important to me and maybe to you too. With our wedding coming up in fifteen days, my writing frequency has taken a sharp decline lately, hence why it is important that I hunker down and get this written so that I can then take my pooch out and enjoy this beautiful day.
As I wrote in a previous blog Going Down The Road Of Integrative Medicine, since November, I have been going to a wellness center in a nearby town to see an integrative medicine doctor in the hopes that they can help resolve some of my autoimmune issues. Because let’s be honest, I have been treated for Sjogren’s syndrome for over five years now by traditional doctors and I haven’t really gotten too far. Actually last year, I would say that in many aspects I even got worse. I have some very excellent specialists who know what they are doing but I am beginning to learn that chronic illness, especially autoimmune disorders, are extremely difficult to manage and treat. When they are treated, it usually means with potent and caustic medications, some of which can eventually kill you. The medications used treat the symptoms, not the cause of the illness.
Don’t get me wrong, I am not abandoning traditional western medicine. I feel strongly that there is a place for medications like steroids and stomach acid blocking medications (PPI’s). However I also feel strongly that staying on these medications indefinitely is not the answer to managing my Sjogren’s. For someone else, it may be and that is OK. But there came a point last year where I looked at my medication list and it contained about fifteen different prescription medications. And I was still pretty sick.
As I wrote about in the previous blog, I began my integrative medicine journey by starting an alternative medicine for autoimmune illness called LDN and I also started with allergy testing. Since then, I have spent countless hours, fifteen hours to be exact, having extensive intradermal allergy testing done. I was shocked by the results. I am allergic to most molds, weeds, grasses, and trees as well as cats and dust. I now receive five allergy shots every single week.
As many of you know, I also changed to a Paleo diet. This was not suggested by my integrative medicine doctor but rather it was something I researched on my own. I strive for an 80% compliance rate with this way of eating.
However as the months went on, I started to become frustrated with my integrative medicine doctor. I felt very rushed during my appointments and I didn’t feel like I was being treated as a whole person, which is an integral part of this modality of treatment. I was anxious just going to these appointments. I wasn’t getting returned phone calls in a timely manner over an issue that was pretty significant at the time and I felt like my practitioner and I were not connecting in a therapeutic way. He wasn’t the right doctor for me.
However I had been doing a lot of research about the use of integrative medicine in treating autoimmune illness and on top of that, I really liked the rest of the staff at the wellness center. I looked into switching to another provider. I have to be honest, this was very difficult for me because I still have a hard time advocating for myself at times. Especially since this is a relatively small practice and I knew there was a chance of running into my old provider. But at the end of the day, my health and wellness is the priority.
Yesterday was my second visit with my new practitioner. I will call her S. She is a physician’s assistant who is new to the practice. This did give me pause when I made the appointment because I wanted to make sure I saw someone with experience. I decided to take a leap of faith and it certainly paid off.
I never feel rushed during my visits with S. and she made it very clear that she is there to help me get as healthy as I possibly can. One of her concerns was about the GERD medicines (PPI’s) I am on due to my Sjogren’s. I knew there were risks to long term use of these medications (Nexium and Zantac) but I didn’t know the full scope of the risks and issues associated with their use. If you do a Google search of “risks with PPI’s”, you will see what I mean. She also explained to me about how our body needs stomach acid for proper digestion and that it is likely I am not absorbing the nutrients and supplements that I am taking because I am suppressing my natural stomach acid. It seems counterproductive to me to eat very healthy and take supplements if I am counteracting their effects. However I also know that my reflux issues are real and severe due to my malfunctioning esophagus. I have had some relief from dietary changes but it hasn’t been enough.
S. suggested two supplements that I can take for my stomach (Mastica and Zinlori 75) that helps restore the natural state of digestion, rather than suppressing it. She told me to stay on my prescription meds until these have a chance to kick in and then if I feel comfortable with it, to start weaning off of them. She compared the PPI’s to prednisone. They both suppress the problem but they do nothing to solve it.
This is where things become tricky for me. I do realize that as my prescription med list shortens, my supplement list gets longer. And I am OK with that because it is part of getting my body to heal itself and I imagine I won’t be on these supplements forever. I have also noticed that as the shift occurs, I am starting to feel better. However the issue for me is trying to deal with all the other specialists that prescribe these medications. To them, they are doing what they think is in my best interest but they are not the ones living with the consequences of these medications; many of which sometimes don’t even work all that well.
So I had a heart to heart with S. about this. I explained to her that I take a lot of crap from my other doctors for going to the wellness center. There is an incredible amount of resistance in the medical world to the concept of the body being able to heal itself. I have already had to deal with my rheumatologist and pulmonologist regarding this and now I am going to have to face my gastroenterologist who is old school and most likely will flip out over me weaning off my meds. S. was very supportive about this. She gave me a great pep talk about continuing to advocate for myself and my body. She said that it is my choice to take her recommendations and there is no pressure to do so. She spent a lot of time printing out some appropriate articles for me that may be helpful to present to my other specialists. Our discussion reminded be that I am strong and resilient. I have to remember to be that way when I go to my other doctor’s appointments. S. made me feel like we are partners in this journey and it was in that moment that I knew I could trust her. I knew she was the right fit for me.
I will be honest, the road of integrative medicine is still a very scary road for me. It defies everything I was taught in nursing school. It defies everything I have been told by the bazillion doctors I have seen over the years. That being said, I know in my gut that something about it feels very right to me. As my medication list shortens more and more each week, I look at where I am now compared to where I was at this time last year and the evidence is there. I may not be a vision of perfect health and I may not be in a place to go back to work yet, but I am definitely several steps closer.
I know that what may work for managing my health may not work for everyone. But I am taking the time this morning to write this because I want people to be aware that there are other options to treating your autoimmune illness, as well as the many other chronic illnesses. There are answers and soutions beyond the pharmaceutical industry and I think we all owe it to ourselves to explore as many of those options as we can whether it be vitamins, supplements, diet, exercise, massage, acupuncture, meditation, stress management, yoga, reiki, prayer…whatever it is that you feel comfortable trying. Open up your computer or visit a bookstore to learn more. Don’t settle for what you’ve been told. Don’t settle for the words “there is no cure.”
Learn.
Fight.
Reclaim your body.